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Convert this conversation between Steven Colbert and Michelle Obama into a useable script with SC: [TEXT] and MO: [TEXT]
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SC: Our first guest tonight might be the most popular person in the whole country. She is an author, a podcaster, and former First Lady of the United States. Her newest number one bestseller is called The Look. Please welcome Michelle Obama.

MO: Thank you. How you doing?

SC: Thank you not only for being here, but for being part of the Nelson family Christmas party. What a family—military, Army, veterans. Beautiful.

MO: Yes, make sure to thank them for their service. Beautiful family. I was excited to be part of that.

SC: How many cards do the Obamas send out for Christmas?

MO: We checked—it's over 100,000.

SC: No!

MO: Of our closest friends and family. That includes friends, business people, foundation folks—it’s a lot of people we want to thank.

SC: Do you have to pay for postage?

MO: I have no idea.

SC: Do you exchange gifts as a family?

MO: We do. Everybody gets a gift. I’m usually orchestrating it. The girls don’t have any money, so we’re like, don’t take our money and buy us a gift—we know it’s ours.

SC: My kids do that too, and they want credit for it.

MO: It’s a bad message. But Christmas is huge for me. We wake up, have brunch, friends come over, we read a letter from Santa, open gifts—all of that.

SC: Who writes the letter from Santa?

MO: My sister-in-law’s ex-husband.

SC: Let’s not go there.

MO: Let’s not.

SC: Does your husband get you good gifts?

MO: He does now. He has help—my stylist. Early on, he tried… and I’d say, “Oh yeah, you tried.”

SC: Have you ever returned one?

MO: I’ve never returned it, but sometimes he just never saw it again.

SC: Would you talk to my wife? Mine come back like a boomerang.

MO: It’s the effort that counts.

SC: Is it appropriate to give your own book as a Christmas gift?

MO: I didn’t. I sent it when it came out, so I didn’t double back and give it again.

SC: During the White House years, how many holiday parties did you attend?

MO: Weeks and weeks—two or three a day, plus a big one every evening. Thousands of people. We’d stand for three hours taking photos.

SC: Like being Santa at the mall.

MO: Exactly. And you feel bad—they’re waiting in line while the party’s upstairs.

SC: When’s the last time you were at a mall?

MO: It’s been a while, but I’ve been in stores recently.

SC: Do people still recognize you everywhere?

MO: Plenty of times they don’t. If the Secret Service stays quiet and I put on a cap and casual clothes, I blend in. People aren’t really looking at each other anymore.

SC: I heard you’re driving again.

MO: Yes—started the summer before last. Mostly on Martha’s Vineyard. It’s like pretend driving—security in front and back—but I’m alone in the car, windows down.

SC: That must feel amazing.

MO: It does. I hadn’t done that in years. One day Malia and I were in the car alone with music playing—it felt normal again.

SC: Did you remember how to drive?

MO: It’s like riding a bike. But the technology is different—no keys, everything’s new.

SC: Does Barack drive?

MO: He’s driven maybe twice. It’s exciting for both of us—those normal moments.

SC: You do a podcast with your brother Craig.

MO: Yes, and I wouldn’t do it without him. I like doing things in community. It started after we lost our mom—it felt like a way to honor her.

SC: You had Katt Williams on.

MO: Oh my gosh. His story is unbelievable—left home at 12. I kept saying, “If you’re lying, I’m going to be mad.” But that’s what I love—people open up over time.

SC: I’d love to come on.

MO: I’d love that. Maybe bring Molly too.

SC: I should mention—I'm sorry for your loss. You knew Rob and Michele Reiner.

MO: Yes. They were some of the most decent, courageous people you could know. Passionate about family, fairness, and this country. That’s the truth.

SC: We’ll be right back.

SC: People love your husband.

MO: Oh yeah. The girls and I make fun of him constantly. He goes out, builds himself up, then comes home and we tear him down.

SC: Is he upset he never had a UFC fight on the White House lawn?

MO: I thought there were rules and norms!

SC: You’ve written a book about fashion. Are you surprised people care so much about what you wear?

MO: Not really. First Ladies have always been judged on style. It’s part of the role. Those clothes get archived—people connect with them.

SC: Did you save everything?

MO: The important pieces are donated to the White House Historical Association. They’ll be in the Obama Presidential Center.

SC: What’s the book about beyond fashion?

MO: It’s about what it takes for women to show up in the world. We’re often judged by how we look. When people want to diminish a woman, they attack her appearance. So how do we reclaim that and turn it into power?

SC: Tell me about meeting Oprah.

MO: She came to our home early on with a camera crew. I didn’t know I needed makeup—I was just running around with kids and work. Later, she sent me a trunk full of clothes as a gift.

SC: That’s amazing.

MO: We had to send it back because Barack was in office. But later, when he wasn’t, Oprah sent it again.

SC: You can’t beat Oprah.

MO: You really can’t.

SC: Quick fashion lightning round—cargo shorts?

MO: Depends on the man and how they’re styled.

SC: Crocs?

MO: Not on men.

SC: Tank tops?

MO: Depends on your arms.

SC: Overalls?

MO: No. Where are you going?

SC: Shoes without socks?

MO: Not bad.

SC: Birkenstocks?

MO: I love them. They’ve evolved—and they’re comfortable.

SC: Who were your style icons?

MO: Teresa Graves from Get Christie Love—she was beautiful, strong, stylish. And José Cardenal from the Chicago Cubs—I had a huge crush.

SC: That’s a mix.

MO: Total mix. I was a tomboy too. My dad and I used to watch Cubs games together—that’s where that love came from.

SC: Did you ever meet him?

MO: Yes, at the White House when the Cubs won the World Series. I told him the story, and he cried. Full circle moment.

SC: The book is out now—Michelle Obama, everybody. Thank you so much.

MO: Thank you.